Nothing left to do but chant

Now, after understanding that none of the following can help me:

1. friends
2. family
3. money
4. mind
5. intelligence
6. false ego

I've come to the conclusion that the only thing left to do is

CHANT

There is nothing else left to do. I cannot help anyone. I cannot save myself. I cannot get any power through knowledge or speculation. My intelligence cannot save me.

So... it's going to be Krishna's voice from within. I do my duties (remembering Krishna), and the remaining time I CHANT. Then, if and when Krishna decides to give me an indication, I will act accordingly, speak accordingly, do accordingly. Other than that, I have no hope, no way to make my existence useful, no way to stop or slow down my accelerated path down to hell. I am drowning. I am in great illusion, thinking myself very smart. I cannot save myself, no matter what I know theoretically.

Matir na Krishne, parato svato va

I hope I can cry to Krishna to help me attach my mind to spiritual activities like hearing about Him, glorifying Him. On my own, with my own effort, I cannot change my habits and activities suddenly. I will take time, and I will need constant feedback. My Gurudeva is so wonderful and merciful, that by his grace, I am able to chant and perform hearing to some extent.

May I always worship Sri Krishna Caitanya and all the vaishnavas. May I always glorify my Gurudeva, a confidential servant of Sri Krishna Caitanya. May I humbly serve vaishnavas to receive grace on this path. There is no other hope for me.

My actions do not match my thinking, and I can understand that I am covered over with many layers, some of which I cannot perceive. This is all the more why I should completely cry and surrender to the Lotus Feet of my Lord and Master.